Social Hangover Survival Kit

Anyone who knows me well knows that I am an introvert.  I love me some alone time.  So, it's only natural that after a week that includes Thanksgiving with family and friends, my daughter being home from school and with me 24/7, and all other types of major social interactions, I would be suffering from what I like to call a "Social Hangover" .  I am currently writing this blog from my "Bubble of Bliss" and it inspired me to help you to survive your own Social Hangovers, if ever needed.  

I had to have surgery about a month ago (nothing serious) and part of the recovery process requires me to spend 5 days a week sitting inside of a Hyperbaric Oxygen Chamber for 2 hours at a time.  It has a whole lot of really cool health benefits and it also happens to be an introvert's dream!!!  I also feel like a badass because they have to ask if I brought any of my hand grenades or other flammable weapons every time I come in.  I always reassure them that they are safely locked away in my locker in the dressing room.  (One can never be too careful.)  I even get my very own Gatekeeper of Sanity.  He stands guard over me and protects me from those who might dare approach my chamber with weapons or small talk. I have knighted him, Sir John the Valiant.

sir-john-the-valiant

He also provides me with entertainment during my time in there.  Today, he showed me a documentary called, "Finders Keepers".  If you have never seen it, I highly recommend it.  I'll sum it up for you.  A guy got his leg amputated, chose to store it in his BBQ pit...in his storage unit.  He then forgot to pay his monthly fees for said storage unit and the man who bought all of his items in an auction became the proud new owner of a human leg...and refused to give it back!  Because, you know, he might need a spare one day?!?  A law suit ensued (see what I did there?) and a documentary was born.  It was epic.  Good times were had by all.  I promise I am telling you all of this for a reason.

I now present you with everything you will need in order to survive your next Social Hangover...

Social Hangover Survival Kit: 

  1. A Hyperbaric Chamber, a very large hamster ball, or a secret portal to Narnia...whatever is most accessible to you.  No need to stress over this choice too much.
  2. A bucket FULL of stress balls for you to throw at people, as you see fit, throughout the day.  Whoever invented the stress ball should be given an award.  Nailing people with those really is quite cathartic.
  3. Junk Food.  "Why yes, I HAVE had snack cakes, bacon, and Diet Coke for every meal today.  You have a comment about that?  Here, let me show you my new basket of stress balls."
  4. Ridiculous entertainment that makes you feel better about your life and the people in it.  I mean, at least I'm not being sued by someone for cuddling with his amputated leg every night and then refusing to give it back.  I seriously plan to run all of my responses to every frustration in my life through that filter from this point on.  I think it's really going to help.
  5. This sweater... introvert-sweater Need I say more?

Ok.  I think I have fully prepared you.  Now, go out and share your new found wisdom with others.  Just one piece of advice...send them an email.  You will probably never get past their Gatekeeper of Sanity without that approach.

 

Share This:

One thought on “Social Hangover Survival Kit

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *